Love Shove.

Lately, I've found myself playing Agony Aunt to many of my friends. Of course, all their issues are pertinent to love and relationships. But what is most interesting is how I am somehow the "Go-To" friend especially since I know absolutely zilch about ishq, mohabbat and related fundas. However, when it comes to giving solid advice, I'm the queen. Somehow it flows from me like I was meant to advise my close gals on how to deal with guys. Most of the time the issues are simple. "He isn't committing. What do I do?" or "He's so hot and cold! Main kya karu?" And while when I was in both frustrating situations, I said and did the completely wrong things, I know exactly what my girls should do and the advice always works. (Times like this I really want to add the hashtag: #givesadvicelikeaboss! Booyah!)

The other day a friend and I were conversing about the ideal man. We decided that the perfect guy should have certain attributes that we both individually required in our men. I listed my top ten; she did the same. Then the conversation turned to, "Well what if he has eight of the ten? Do you let go cause he's not got it all?" I immediately realized that there is no such idea as the perfect man. Or woman even. We're all filled with flaws and for the most part, those flaws make us human. I would in reality, hate living with the ideal man. There would be no room for error and so there would be no moments where I was pissed off and needed to be pacified. It's those situations make relationships such fun, no?

I'm not one to settle. No way. If I had to, I would have already married a kinda-sorta perfect man who had it all except the ability to love and keep me happy emotionally. I would be well settled in a beautiful house and so on. But that's not how it works. Remember that dialogue from the Kabhi Alvida Na Kehna? It goes:
"Kehte Hai, ke shaadi ki bunyaad beintihaan mohabbat honi chahiye;
Aur kuch nahin.
Kyunki agar bunyaad galat ho, toh rishte toot jaate hai."
Somehow it resonated with me. Ultimately, it all comes down to the L word. Because when all the extras end - the money, the holidays, the jewelry and the fancy car, you need a man/woman who will sit in bed with you and stare at the ceiling. Only a person who loves you deeply, passionately and unconditionally, can do that with you. I once heard Sushmita Sen talk about her affair with Vikram Bhatt. When asked if she was wrong to be in a love relationship with a married man, she replied, "All I know is that I was in love. There is no other reason." There is never any other rationalism when it comes to love.

At heart I'm a romantic. I want a grand love story which ends with nothing but love. Kya karu, after all, Main Prem (love) ki Deewani Hoon!

1 comment:

A.R.Ebhi said...

Good one ! made sense !


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