January Ramblings

By Roshni Mulchandani

Okay, so lots to say. In fact, so much to say that I actually bullet-pointed them on a trustworthy post-it note so I wouldn't forget. So here goes - a dish-dash of ramblings, Roshni-style.

Divine 2009

So the year has begun officially, and I'm not sure what to make of it as of yet. Into my email inbox, two interesting emails arrived a few days ago. The first one was about the power of God. The email read:

"When I was young I remember my grandmother telling me that whenever I am afraid to face new challenges in life then I should remember God; for only the Almighty has the divine power to make things work. She told me that at one point of time a person is denied help because of jealousy or it could be because of circumstances. But God listens to our prayers because He does not deny help to his children. At that time a miracle for me was getting a new toy or doing well in exams but now when I look back a prayer for me is a feeling of security."

I read this email and pondered over how true it was. God helps everyone regardless of their color, caste, creed or situation. However, he does what He sees is good for you. We may not see it at that point as beneficial for us, but it is in our best interest. Later on, when we look back and take a bird's eye view at the situation, we can see it in a more clearer light. It is only then, that we sigh and thank God for giving us pain in that time, but helping us understand why we had to see that pain and unhappiness.

Emotional Cleanup

And then, into my inbox, popped another email which really made me stop in my tracks:

"Today's Full Moon tugs on your soul from a very deep place, perhaps bringing up memories from your childhood. But, in theory, you aren't interested in looking through your rear view mirror. You are anxious to cut a path through the jungle of your feelings in order to arrive at your destination. In practice, however, you might still have some emotional cleanup to complete before moving forward."

How true. I realized, much before this email, that I really do have some emotional cleanup to do. Its a cleansing experience which I personally know is ongoing as we speak. However, it is one that needs to happen in my life. My childhood has given me lots of harsh and unhappy memories, but I prefer to look at the happier moments and cherish those instead. I guess it is hard, when you come from a broken home, but my dysfunctional family works in the most greatest and divine of ways. We managed to spend seven days including Christmas together after nine years. It was amazing in the most strangest of ways. Its nice to see that we are still a family and can come together when we need to. So yes, I have reached a crosspoint in my life and "feel lost in a jungle of feelings." But, i will get through it all and finally reach my destination.

Climbing the Ladder

A few months ago, I read bits of the book, "The Secret." The book explains that if you ask the universe for anything, it will give it to you. One condition: You must ask genuinely and with your whole heart. I saw Ru Ba Ru, and all I asked for, with my all my heart, to speak to Randeep Hooda. Well, it seems that the universe heard my call and last week, I was lucky enough to interview him for BollySpice. He was A-M-A-Z-I-N-G! Starting off in his flirtatious ways, he said he had flowers for me, and towards the end said I made his day! Eeeks! I was floored. Such a fun, friendly and hot guy! And then, I got even luckier and scored an interview with ace publicist, Dale Bhagawagar. He is such a gem! His interview is absolutely juicy, fun and more importantly informative! Lots of hot info on the stars but at the same time, showing off his experience. I really am so lucky that I have managed to become friends with him, cause he is such a great guy and I am so lucky to have a mentor like him around.

Disgusted at Israel

Israel has started its share of nonsensical and unnecessary bombings on Gaza. Historically, I know that both countries have had a lot of tension and while I know very little about their pasts, I know that these bombings are doing nothing for their relationship. Poor children, babies even, are dying. I was so hurt and shocked to see pictures of little kids being buried by their parents who had dreams in their eyes and hope for the future. Such attacks are ignorant and insensitive. I do hope they decide to end this and think of better ways to sort out their problems. In the meantime, my thoughts and prayers are with the people of Gaza; my condolences to the fallen and my personal condemnation of such heinous behavior.

Major Achievements

I had my first major achievement today - my article on the Mumbai Terror Attacks, to the editor was published in the SCMP! YAY! After a long time, my dad was so proud of me. It felt amazing. I climbed my first step to reaching my goal in life and it feels like heaven! Exciting as I embark on a fabulous journey!

On a side note...

One thing people don't know about me is that if I don't know something, or find myself lost in a conversation of which I have no knowledge, I come home and read up about it. I feel so uncomfortable until I find out more about it. The same goes for questions I don't know - I look up the answers immediately! I don't want to be the girl that doesn't know anything about the world and I promise myself to never be that girl. I may be the "Jack of all trades, master of none," but thats fine! I like trying my hand at many different things and even more like knowing how to do everything and anything. At the same time, I think its important we all stand for a cause. Every citizen should be passionate about things going on in the world and voice their opinions. This gives the rest of the world many perspectives of a situation which educates them and makes them think. Ultimately, we are citizens of the world and it is our innate duty to stand up and ask for what our governments give us. We choose them so we have the choice to chuck them out.

I wish there was more time in a day - 24 hours doesn't cut it for me. I feel like I don't get accomplish, or rather tick-off, everything I plan to do usually. My trusty post-it note doesn't get completely ticked and has to get rolled over to the next day! Someone needs to do something about it and give us a couple more hours in a day, otherwise I'm going to become an insomniac. I already see it happening and its scary. I think I'm just excited about whats going on in my life with regards to my writing so I can't wait for the sun to rise and things to happen!

I would like to say I have learnt from all my mistakes - which I genuinely believe I have, but it is so hard to tell anyone to tell anyone to learn from mine and not repeat them. Ideally, that would be so much better; don't make the mistakes I made, but everyone learns differently and you HAVE to make your own mistakes to experience grief and disappointment.

And lastly, I want to make it on my own. This way, I can take credit for my own success. I know its an uphill hill struggle but it is something I know I can deal with. I love to work and especially write. I have found myself asking for help and being shut down. But that's okay - I can do it on my own and definitely succeed at it. This actually works out well - when I do make it, and with God's grace I will, I can take the credit for myself!

Brother-Sister Bonding, Cricket, Indian comedians and all that Shin-Ding

Recently chilling with my brother every night, I have rediscovered my love for cricket. I miss watching the old crew - Dada, Sachin, Dravid, Kumble, Srinath etc play cricket like the world is going to end. However, another New Year's resolution which I am going to adding to my list, is to watch all the matches India plays this year. I can't believe I missed watching any matches during in 2008 whichSaurav was playing before he quit. But I miss him terribly! He is and will always be the Prince of Calcutta.

We've also been watching lots of Indian standup comedians. Gawd! they are hilarious the way they interpret typical Indian stereotypes. Dan Nainan is our new favorite who is a Japanese-Indian and cracks the most amazing jokes with a straight face. Look him up -I guarantee laughs!

I'm gonna miss my bro when he leaves. In the last few days, we've sat up late and chilled at night watching YouTube videos, chatted and laughed. But he has to go back and get on with his degree. In the meantime, check out Kumar Sangakarra sledging Shaun Pollock. This is cricket at its funniest and competitive best!