The Urban Rickshaw: Of Kim and Barbies!

The Urban Rickshaw is my attempt at a monthly column. Why the title? Umm, quite simply cause I’m as urban as they get (ironically, I currently reside in the burbs of California but boo hoo) and the autorickshaw is my most favorite mode of transport. There’s no real smart funda here. But figuratively speaking, The Urban Rickshaw aims to take you on a “ride” through issues and news that affects modern, urban folks— much like us. All this as you chill on my rickshaw, of course.

Kim Kardashian…if only she were Desi 

They knew early!
So for all this talk about love and nuptials, Kim has really put herself in quite a predicament with her 72 day marriage, no? While the international media is calling this a staged act, a publicity stunt and so on, here’s a Desi girl’s take on the her quickie marriage and even quicker divorce. Personally, I’m slightly more conservative when it comes to marriage— this is my OTT Desi opinion, but I think marriage is a bond forever. No matter how hard it gets. Please note: I am a byproduct of a “broken home” putting it politically incorrectly. My parents worked at it for seventeen years before they called it quits. Kim’s 72 days is a complete sham in comparison. On the other hand, if I shed my conservative mask, I think she knew she was doomed from the beginning. For all those who followed Kim and Kris Humphries from their courting to marriage, you figured out rather early that he was a royal jerk. That said, she could have easily called it off, one would think. Problem is she would have lost out on close to $18 million buckaroos. Ain’t nobody gonna give that up. And so, it made more sense for her to live with the jerk— yes, that is what we are naming him forever, stick it out for a few days, all of 72, and then ta-ta bye-bye. Now if Kim were Desi, she may have stuck it out a bit more: 720 days at least. Then we probably wouldn’t have deemed her pathetic and so on. Where do I lie with this? On the fence. So I put this to the one woman who would give me the best explanation: my grandmother. Her answer: “What do Americans know about marriage? It’s a joke for them. And a woman is incomplete without a man, you know (this was a stab at me, by the way). Now everyone will look at her and say, ‘See she couldn’t even keep her man.’” On a side note, I refused to tell her this was her second marriage. I was too worried she’d have a heart attack.

Barbie Gone Deglam

Barbie the Nerd
I really thought it was only our Bollywood actresses who went about scraping for deglam roles because they believed it would add substance to their careers. Negative. The makers of Barbie have come out with this new angle to Barbie called, “I Can Be”. The idea is to normalize Barbie. So now instead of Princess Barbie and Prom Barbie, you can have Architect Barbie—which is apparently the 2011 career of the year (where they got this from, I have no idea). Is anyone else really bummed by this? I’ll be the first to admit it. I loved Barbie as a child. But I liked her cause she was out of the ordinary, popular and perfect. Barbie didn’t go to school, struggle with acne or bullying. She was OTT and that was the magnetizing factor. She was anything but regular. By normalizing her, Mattel has totally taken away the Barbie novelty factor. What upset me even more was when I saw Computer Engineer Barbie. Imagine all the sleazy Desi guys at Cisco Bangalore. The thought of a Barbie working in their office must really make them want to work “harder”. In the words of Twitter, #epicfail.

And keeping with the theme of autorickshaws, guess what? Mumbai rickshaw wallahs will now be given a lesson or two in politeness and etiquette. Yeah, no more rude crude drivers. What more could you want? The best mode of transport and good service too. Oh and soon, you’ll be able to dial and call for a rick. It just gets better!

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